Bonjour.

weeeeeeee

Tuesday, December 8, 2009 @ 12/08/2009 12:57:00 AM

ahhh, felt miserable on Sunday night. fuuuuh!!

skip

skip

skip

and sooo, everything has settled now.(clap hands uh) we are back together and guess what? we are happy! yeah. especially me! like the picture above! haha. well since everything has settled, its time for me to celebrate. kkuangkuang. how? i also dont know. heh.

alright, as things are back to its shape, i guess my blog wont be the 'emo' kind of blog like somebody commented. you know who. well,its 1 am now but i still cant sleep.. my mum lah! she play on my bed until the game finish. aiya, im also playing. heh. fun what? haha. ok lah, since its getting late alr, i shall go to sleep. night!

0 comments

another sigh

Saturday, December 5, 2009 @ 12/05/2009 11:54:00 AM

im so confused now. i really dont know whats happening to me. yes, everything has settled. but i dont think my heart allows me to.

last night, all my predictions came true. i knew something bad would happen. now what? i cnt just let all my predictions control me? sigh. ya, i cried the hardest yesterday. i couldnt really think properly. what am i becoming? my eyes are swollen, my heart is bleeding, and whats more? my mind went to the hospital.

you know, im just worried that you would leave me after agreeing on some stuffs. im so afraid. what if that day happens again?

sigh.

i hope you're there thinking of me and thinking how will it benefit us if we keep on going like this.
and ti tell you the truth,i've been waiting for you to say that since that day happened. you said that im more important than those little people. im so glad. because during that day, i didnt get what i wanted so i just give in and say, you know what just have your freedom. until today that your finally loving me more than them. i was just waiting for today.

and now that i got what i wanted, im afraid that you yourself wont agree with this deep deep in your heart. im afraid that you'll keep things from me and eventually, that day will happen again.
i hope not. i'll pray for both of us to be in good conditions and hope that you're not pulling this back from me.

im really born unlucky. im sick, im hurt, im crying, im bleeding, im bruised, im aching, im injured......... yesyes! im born this way! and i hate it!! :'(:'(:'(
seriously, im really tired of crying, i think you know it to. why cant i just live a normal life? i dont care if i live in poverty, what i need is happiness and love. life isnt fair. sigh.

just to tell you this, yesterday, i was really hurt when you say you didnt had freedom and that i didnt kept my promise. im so hurt. then, all along, all my resolution to you to make you happy has all gone to waste. you know im trying so hard for myself to be the best person for you, im trying. just when i thought i was doing the right thing, you disheartened me. i know certain things i am upset with. like today.but did i disallow you to go? no right?
your freedom consist many things inside dear. i cant conquer it all, to be honest. like about friends, going to parties and so on. there's things that i couldnt accept. and i know it myself, i couldnt changed myself concerning this topic. you understand me right? i just dont want you to hold a deep grudge towards me in you. and now, finally i've got what i wanted, im happy.

you know, i have a deeper feeling about this. im not in a mood to blog it out. im sorry.

0 comments

its really over for me

Friday, December 4, 2009 @ 12/04/2009 03:30:00 PM

maybe i was a jerk to let that day happened. but i didnt know everything. it was all held back deep in you. it wasnt entirely my fault afterall. when that day came about, i was so sure deep in my heart, that everything was my fault. during the phone call, when i beg you to get back, you insisted. you said that you didnt want to repeat you mistakes of having me to control your life. it looks like i was at fault. but what about the back scenes? when i wasnt there with you?

when we were together, you didnt told me a thing about my tone and attitude towards you. everything were kept from me. i was upset after promising me to never keep things from me. yes, i trusted, i trusted you from the beginning. now, eventhough you had violated and misused my trust towards you, i never pull myself off. my trust towards you will still be there in me no matter what happens.

then, it was another issue. this reallyreally hit me deepdeep down in my heart. i was really bruised. whenever i thought of this, my heart will squeeze itself, making it bleed all over me. then there it went, i had a booboo deep in my heart.
yeah, you were a dog to me. thats what you said. then im sorry. you never told me, it wasnt my blame. *hurt*.

how on earth could you find yourself another love after breaking up a day ago? it was so fast that i couldnt imagine it. i couldnt accept that reality, really. this made me so hurt, that until now, im still bringing up this issue everyday, evrynight. what happened to me?

sigh.

i know you would start asking me this, why are you still discussing and commenting about this topic? i thought its over?
its not over for me. its really not. everyday, my heart will add itself a kg so as to make it heavy. and eventually, it'll accumulate and the problem is basically getting more and more. so why not we together restrain everything away from our r/s now? please..... there's really a way right?

and now, during my hard days, you are off to that hotel for a night, when tonight is my most precious night ever. i dont know why but i have this feeling that i will need you the most, i will need you there, close to me, i will need you there to call and comfort me,to aid me and to also lift my hands up in the sky and waving at you to show signs of happiness and delightness . it seems like tonight is the night that i would cry the hardest among the other nights. i kept messaging you just now regarding my conditions. i hope you could predict how am i tonight and hope that you will at least call me ok? i will wait for your call, i really will.

have fun and takecare.
please call me

0 comments

MISERY ALL OVER ME

Thursday, December 3, 2009 @ 12/03/2009 09:16:00 PM

what's happening to me? why am i feeling bothered everyday, every night? why cant i just forget that day? why must i be tortured? why couldnt i let free of things that meant to be gone forever? why?

every night, my pillow case would be drenched, my heart's torned apart, my mind is in a mess like on the roads, my eyes brimming with tears. i couldnt take it anymore. i had to let out my feelings. sadly, nobody understands. maybe you, but a part from me have not been solved yet. nobody can solve the part from me. nobody.

a feeling so lonely every night. nobody's there for me. every night, i have the urged to message you. but i wouldnt want to disturb you from sleep. i had to figure out what's happening to me each night, why am i in this state. why god kept wanting me to not forget about that day? is there something He wants to let me know? is there anything im not aware of? or something kept from me that i didnt know? must i figure it out? where's the clue that leads me to the truth? or is it just me that couldnt accept the fact? i dont know up till today....

haiz. god, please let me walk the right path of my life. dont let this affect me and my life. i dont want myself to be miserable so as to the people closest to me. i want to live a life that is full of joy, laughters and love. why couldnt i move on?

im sorry for what i've done in the past,really sorry. i knw i have controlled your life. but you didnt tell me a thing. i thought my behaviour was still considered average. but in the end.....
im still sorry. im not gonna repeat my past again. so are you ok? i want things to get better. dont blame me if i were to check your messages. as long as im still bothered. haiz........

you know, when im bored i tend to play games on my psp or laptop. but since both of them were taken away by my parents, i tend to listen to some music of yours. but sometimes, something there in my mind, asking me to stop listening and get something else to do. you know why? because most of the songs there are somehow 'our songs'. it would lead me to memories of the past. it would then lead me to teary eyes and shattered heart. you see, everything around me will affect myself too. i just couldnt neglect those stuff. how? i just dont understand.

you know why i said that even you couldnt understand me? because every time i tell you this, you will say,
haiz, just forget it ok?
cherish the time now.
forget the past.
im sorry.

dear,i know you were trying to help me cool down the situation. but i just cant forget everything that have happened to us. i cant. really. dont be upset alright? maybe things nowadays cannot solved through means of communication. it has to be something else this time.

SIGH!

0 comments

Malaysia

Saturday, November 21, 2009 @ 11/21/2009 04:25:00 PM

hi.

so today,i decided to tag along with my family and my brother's, girlfriend's family(kak ain,filza and aunty fauziah) to malaysia. hah! they were very fun to be with. they kept on talking nonsense stuffs like me. heh. no wonder my brother loves to be with them more than with us. hmm,hmm. finally figured it out.

we fetch them around 830am. and i thought only kak ain and mum followed. but in the end the sister came along too. we had to squeeze like sardines behind. mus buy a bigger car than nissan sunny, my dad said. it was indeed a very long journey. so we had to tahan abit lah.

1st stop, perling. quite far you know. went there for the wedding thingy. bought small boxes to put sweets as souvenirs. then after quite some time, decided to go foe breakfast. damn i was so hungry! so ate buffet at jakkel. so bloody damn nice! should go there again sia, really. and off we headed to the next wedding shop. it was under jakkel organisation. before we went there, all the workers have already waited for us outside! sial uh. about 6 sales person followed us sia! 1 person want to buy then 6 tagged along. we were so frustrated and decided to leave even though all their workers said,
buy this lah, please lah.
got offer wan, from 400rm, we cn give you 200rm
offer leh, sister
discount you knw
come and buy if not you're gonna regret this
bought already?
you can proceed to the cashier
buy leh, offer already
okok, we can discuss the price, dont worry, just buy

WTH! they were like begging us to buy leh. we were damn afraid and annoyed so we just left the shop. next stop, angsana. as kak ain insisted for a&w for dessert, we stopped by angsana but at the end the shop had closed down. but she didnt mind, there's a lot more fast food there. but we went to shop 1st. i wanted to buy anna lui wallet but it was too EXEXEX. so i decided to buy a school bag. but all the bags there didnt suit my taste. so my mum decided to buy me a lappy! woohoo! i was damn happy man. heh.

then, off to dunkin donuts. my mum bought 12 peices of different flavours. it wasnt that nice compared to J.CO. their donuts are much more softer. but nevermind. at least i had donuts. after that, watsons. bought chocs and snacks. and i wanted to buy revelon for my hair but my mum said next time. haiya.

since we got tired and hungry, we went to KFC to eat. know what? their menu was sososo much different from us in singapore. i think theirs is much more nicer and cheaper. their cheese fries is cheese wedges. nice right? they had many more unusual stuff than we see in singapore accept for zinger. heheh,my fav. but after seeing much more, i decided to buy a different one that you cant find in singapore's KFC. heheh. and you knw what? i packed home some chickens to eat at home. then what i didnt know was, they gave us free chilli sauce bottle! wooohooo! so satisfying man!

and then, my dad bought some babat soup. hahaha. babat! must be nice! at around 2+, we decided to head home as the sky looked like its gonna burst anytime. and so, squeezing time again. haish! bought popcorn and bubble gum on the way home. kak ain and filza bought candy floss and my dad bought mushroom goreng and it was damn nice sia, you guys should try it. heh. then i realised im getting fatter, so i stopped eating. nevertheless,i still continued eating when i reached home. home sweet home at around 340. im damn tired now.

bubbye! will, soon update.

Labels: fun

0 comments

a day

Monday, November 16, 2009 @ 11/16/2009 09:06:00 PM

kk, shut up. i was bored k? a little self-obsessed here. hahaha, you know me right? heh. well i got to say that cam whoring is fun! hah!

okok. today went to school as per normal. boring maths lesson. but suprisingly, i managed to survive! yay! (clap hands) hey, stress ok? then off to take zoelyn's bike. damn was it so short. it doesn't hurt at all. can you imagine it? wow! hahaha,sarcasm uh? so, after that went to whitesands to have breakfast. had hot pancakes! wooohooo.... then headed off to somewhere which might as well keep it as a secret. then next stop was dte. we 'bought things' you know. haha.

then the climax. you know..... many things happened. actually 2 only. (incidents) hmmm, to keep it as a secret(as promised), i shall only say 1. basically, my strawberry tea dropped and boooom! die alr. sobsob. precious $2. :(:( so thats it! heheh. short and sweet. but seriously, my drink:(

after that saddening 2 incidents, we had our wings eaten! yeah! old chunkie is the best! my favourite! heh. but porridge more nicer. so we went to central to buy my porridge and eat desserts. i dont know whats the name but it was damn sweet. it was nice, though. heh.

and so sorry! didnt sent you home. i totally forgot you re injured. soso sorry k? next time for sure! then home sweet home at about 4+. bathed and eat my porridge. heeeeee.

takecare uh next time! dont blurblur hor!

2 comments

Saturday, November 14, 2009 @ 11/14/2009 06:53:00 PM

have i changed a lot recently?

well, i guess so. I've changed for the better and at the same time, I've changed for the worst. yes, I'm the better izyan now. but to who? Am i doing this for the sake of doing this? i know I've promised you to change. but I'm confused now. has my attitude towards my parents changed as well? what am i becoming now? help.....

i know I've done many wrongs to my parents. but what are they for here? to educate and love me right? why are they doing this to me? for what reason? how can i give my fullest love and attention to you when you're not? I'm really trying my best in everything i do. i hope you guys appreciate what i did in the past. i know I've done wrong, but do you know the reason behind it? i doubt so...

this is life. i got to stand up and move on in life. i cant sulk in bed and cry the whole day long. I'm izyan, I'm not coward to face all the challenges in life. but what should i do nw?

today, before they leave for lunch, they left me a note:

to izyan,

we have noticed that you've changed a lot. you said whatever your brothers wanted, they got it. but you never think that it is the other way round. when they were your age, they couldn't get what they wanted. it was you that we, especially papa give in. i hope you know what i mean. you wanted bags, we bought for you, you wanted hand phone, we bought for you, you wanted psp, we bought for you. you are my only hope to success. your brothers cant give us what we want.
you said nurul and ibu got along very well because ibu let her do whatever she wants. yeah.... nurul never lied to ibu from the beginning. and she shared everything with ibu. whereas you do not want me to meet your teachers during meet the parents session. in sec 2, you are already in love with a boy. this made us worry.
this house is like hell to you. how can you say that to us? when this home is the place where you are given food to eat, clothes to wear and bed to sleep in.
so our dearest daughter, please think again before you say anything that is hurtful to your parents.
if we controlled you, from before we do not let you go out as you please. you are our only hope, so be our dearest daughter like before. we want that daughter back. the cute, cheerful and happy daughter. we hope you understand our feelings and can we try to mend our brother ties?

your loving,
mama & papa.
ps: WE LOVE YOU BEFORE, NOW AND FOREVER.

haiz. i don't know what to say. some of it may not be true i guess? well, i hope that me and my family will get along in future.

0 comments

pasir ris park for today

Thursday, November 12, 2009 @ 11/12/2009 05:56:00 PM

wellwell.
tiring day.
butt cramps.
aching backbone.
headache.
stupid bag.
annoying seat.

URGH

Well, it's because im not used to exercising. heh. shaddap. at least i know i got to start now. haha. im not gonna suffer in a fishball-like-body. heh.

so we cycled about 20324248483223794 km. not bad huh?? that was when i realised my old bike had to stop and take a rest. so am i. phew. not only my bike and me lor. even my bag! ahhhh! stupid. k, nvm. gonna throw my bag soon.

so we've decided to ride a bike. knw why? the rental for bicycles are so EXEXEX!
we own a bike, so why not try it out. hah! damn tiring! i rode to school. damn im so bodoh. i went straight out to the main road and used the whole bloody long way. urgh!!

then out to down town to 'buy thing'. well, we BOUGHT things you knw. errr, like... coke! yeah. no money lahh. alrite, then off to prp. CYCLECYCLE ALL THE WAY! damn tiring uhh. then went to ws to eat late lunch and early dinner.(?) heh. after much jalanjalan, eventually, we ended up beside the pony!!! so cute! heh. so short lor! hah. by then, my butt really aching. so decided to go home. we intended to go shopping at SPC(sounds interesting huh?). but then time doesnt allow us to go. she has to go home and on soup! talking about food, im hungry now! ok, stop thinking izyan! dont eat so much!!!! ahhhh! kk, stop. so headed home around 4+. and saw valerie on the way home. home sweet home at 4.50.

k, should stop blogging before my readers die of boredom.

i had fun with you today. really. no joke.

Labels: how much have i lose?

4 comments

Do your best!

Saturday, May 9, 2009 @ 5/09/2009 11:38:00 AM

I hope everything's fine. It's not the normal you already.
I'm so lost without you. Te feeling is so undefined.
I dont know wat to do without you.. Please come
back to the normal you? I really miss you a lot.
I hope you can get back to track and forget everything
that had happened. I dont want you to be careless already.
Remember, everyone make mistakes so dont give up and
always hope the best for future. You have a life to live. Make
it a wonderful one. Not misery like this. I can support you
but only if you help your self first. I'll be with you forever to get
through th day. I'll try my best. For now, i want everything to
be out of your mind, and think POSITIVELY!
i know you can do it. I love you baby!

Labels: miss you

0 comments

Tuesday, March 17, 2009 @ 3/17/2009 03:56:00 PM

MISERY ALL OVER ME:(

0 comments

Tuesday, January 27, 2009 @ 1/27/2009 12:36:00 PM

while we were bored................... THIS HAPPENED!

0 comments

sorry

Friday, December 26, 2008 @ 12/26/2008 05:59:00 PM

I'm sorry that I took my anger out on you, everytime, i know. I know im sensitive. That's me. I never meant to do the things I did. I did it out of anger, im sorry. I cant control it, i really cant. Whenever, you made me upset or angry or mad, when you think you're not, i'll just dump my phone away and starts to be moody without thinking anything, your feelings. I know, its just something minor, but i made it very big. IM SORRY! I tried my best to do what's best for you and me, i really tried. I let anger consume me, i didnt control myself. im sorry, im not perfect. I'm sorry im so sensitive, I can't believe i've been so dumb.I know that in the past, i've caused you lots of pain. What I want to say is that I'm sorry I'm always a problem to you, i know it brings you down, but you stand forever by me, and for that you're the best. BUT REALLY IM SORRY. I wont do that again,if my feelings doesnt control me..

0 comments

Friday, December 12, 2008 @ 12/12/2008 10:03:00 PM

I HATED IT WHEN YOU DO THAT

0 comments

sigh again

Wednesday, December 10, 2008 @ 12/10/2008 03:59:00 PM

lean on me. Lean on me and ill never let u go. Hold me tight like you have never ever before. I love you so much that I dont know how much I do. I cant control my happiness and thats a good thing because you were there for me the same I was for you. I know you are my friend and I know that you are great and I dont give a damn, what the others say. Because you are my friend, my really good freind and ill never let you go like you said you wont either. Lean on me, ill never let u go, hold me tight like you have never ever before. I remember your warm smile, or your laugh and how it made my day. Or how your eyes always made me alive. Even though our time is few and far between I love you more each day. I think about our time together. Every funny thing you say. Youre the only friend I trust. The one I know will always be true. If there is only one good thing in my life, i hope it will be you. You're my best friendand in that postion youll stay until I see you again... Someday.

will meet you soon ok?
sorry la,I cant type much..
Giddy alr, bye

Labels: ..

0 comments

Tuesday, December 9, 2008 @ 12/09/2008 04:25:00 PM

I LOVE YOU!!!!

0 comments

24 DAYS

Monday, December 8, 2008 @ 12/08/2008 04:19:00 PM

24 DAYS TO GO!
im really looking forward to see you again,sigh..
how i wish there's no need for me to miss you.
and dont think im a play girl,im not!
i'll always be true to whom im with..
dont be jealous ok?
he's not my type and if he is,i'll still be true
to you..PROMISE

Labels: promise is a promise

0 comments

missing you,missing you

Sunday, December 7, 2008 @ 12/07/2008 05:03:00 PM

WELL THE 2ND POST FOR TODAY:)
I sit alone, with only my thoughts and memories of times past. I sit here sad, waiting for you to come by. I sit here crying, longing to feel your embrace, your kiss. But all of these, I can not have, Im far away. Two hearts apart, yet close together. Longing for each other, yearning for the time. I think of you often and I miss you so. Whenever we meet, I dont want you to go. I miss you more than words can say and I want to let you know that Im missing you today. I pray for you every night because I miss you not being in my sight. I miss the sound of your voice, I miss the way you smell, I miss the look upon your face, I love you so much I can’t deny, for when I see you I will break down and cry.Your sweet kisses made my day complete, I loved you even more then before the previous heart beat.You make my world shine and it glows when Im down, just because there is a person in my life like you, that I have found. Thanks,I love you.

Labels: missing you

0 comments

sighsighsigh

@ 12/07/2008 07:29:00 AM

BABY I MISS YOU..
woke up early,nth to do..
its gna be quite a long way to go,i hope everything's gna be fine..
kept wondering,when will we meet again..
i miss those wonderful moments we had last time..
it was beautiful. I cant imagine,15 days without it and most importantly YOU!
missing you baby..
well,i can only pray and hope for the best..
the rest i rely on God's hands..
i cnt stand this anymore,i need you now,seriously..
im sure you know how i feel because you're feeling the same right?
sigh

Labels: sigh

0 comments

im longing for you

Saturday, December 6, 2008 @ 12/06/2008 12:00:00 PM

When we’re apart you’re all I think of.I long to see your eyes and smile.A smile that lights up my heart with joy and love.I long to hold your hand,just a touch warms my soul.I long to hold you in my arms,arms that give me such a sense of security that nothing could ever take you from me.I long to kiss your precious lips,lips as sweet as candy.I miss you,it hurts to think of everything we went through.I wish you could see my heart. I cry for your touch. Baby i miss you so much,im longing for you right now. You are my drug,i need you,my drug.Without you,i go crazy and drug is my only medicine which is you!I want to be with you,but your millions of miles away. it would make things so much better if i could hear you voice again. it can cure me from this suffering. i wish i could hold you in my arms and look in to your eyes. i promise i will always be true to you and never tell you lies. its so hard to go to sleep without you by my side. my tears are the only thing ill ever try to hide. i lie awake in bed as the tears stream down my face, they keep going until the hit my pillow case. I Miss You...

Baby remember always and forever i love you with all of my heart. PROMISE

Labels: baby i love you

0 comments

SURVEY BY ZOELYN MAH WEN YI! haha! now your turn

Friday, December 5, 2008 @ 12/05/2008 10:13:00 AM

Rules:1. Each player of this game start of with 10 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself.
2. People who get tagged have to write 10 thing little known facts.
3. The end you need to choose 10 people to tag and list out their names.
4. No tag back the person who tagged you.

Here's the 10 weird things/habits/little known facts about me!
1. i like to bath more then 3 times a day..
2. i like to go to toilets
3. like to scare someone~hahahahahahahaha!!!!!
4. i sleep on my cat
5. always clean my bro bike~ IDIOT!
6. never fail to switch on the air-con whenever i sleep
7. never fail to switch on the fan whenever my air-con is switched on
8. i smile at people when i don know them
9.i never feed my hamster before
10. likes to spoil my hp~ now its spoilt! urgh, thanks to you!!

My name!
A: you like to drink
B: you like people
C: you are really silly
D: you like to eat
E: you like to play with dogs
F: you are dead sexy
G: you never let people tell you what to do
H: you have good personality and good looks
I: easy to be with
J: people adore you
K: you are wild and crazy
L: everyone loves you
M: best kisser ever
N: best GF/BF anyone could ask for
O: easy to fall in love with
P: you are popular with all types of people
Q: you are a tomboy
R: you are loyal to those who love you
S: crazy
T: awesome kisses
U: you really like to chill
V: awesome in bed
W: you are very broad minded
X: you love sports
Y: best GF/BF anyone could ask for
Z: always ready

There it goes:
I: easy to be with~ REALLY UH?
Z: always ready~ no leh
Y: best GF/BF anyone could ask for~ yeah, i know
A:you like to drink~ hmm,didnt notice
N:best GF/BF anyone could ask for~ yala i know la..

N:best GF/BF anyone could ask for~ urgh! I KNOW LA!!!
A:you like to drink~no wonder always go toilet..
D:you like to eat~yes of course
H: you have good personality and good looks~yay! im cute..
I:easy to be with~if hard leh?
R:you are loyal to those who love you~ya i know,right?
A: you like to drink~lalalala
H:you have good personality and good looks~no wonder.....

I: easy to be with~okok,get it
S:crazy~haha! AM I?
M:best kisser ever~ ooooh, only you can answer this
A:you like to drink~yaya,i know
I:easy to be with~yaya i know la
L:everyone loves you~really? cool! anybody who loves me please contact me..

People whom i've tagged:1. syahirah!
since she tagg 1 den i tagg 1.. haha!

Labels: enjoy

0 comments

IM OKAY

Friday, November 28, 2008 @ 11/28/2008 11:41:00 AM

ok,basically i'm back from all sickness! YAY!

btw,had a weird dream last night,dont wish to elaborate also, and its super disgusting!!!

And well,to my dearest zoelyn, thanks for everything..

you'd supported me all along when i was sick and i'm really grateful to have you..

I really appreciate you,your helpful, giving ways. And how your generous heart,your unselfishness displays.I thank you for your kindness,i will not soon forget.You’re one of the nicest peopleI have ever met.And to tell you the truth, i did cry every night just hoping you would be here to comfort me.. i felt so lonely,i felt so lost..

i didnt feel you at that point of time and thought i would die..i kept thinking of you because I REALLY LOVE YOU ZOELYN!!!

With all your words you'd given me that time, i knew and i clearly knew that i can

make it through.. Doesnt mean words mean nothing, it do mean alot to me ok?

AND i cant imagine me living without you,its a crazy thing i had think of..

Without you, my heart gets bored,

Without you, my thoughts prevent me from going to bed,

Without you, I am wondering this question at this moment...

My love, where are you hidden?

Without you, my happiness is forbidden,

my heart without you, is not at all replete,my life without you, is so incomplete...

You were all i thought about.In my mind there was no doubt.I REALLY

LOVE YOU!

You will always be with me. As I will always be with you until we cross the gates of heaven. There we will always be together until the end.

AND remember this;

Until the very end of days,until God takes my breath away,until death separates our ways,until then, i love you.When no one is there,when you think no one cares,when love seems too rare,remember, i love you.When everything dissapear,when hopelessness dawns.. Don't forget, i love you..When you fall,when your dreams didnt come true,when hope cant be found,be happy, i love you.When you make mistakes,when you are filled with hate,when you are old and weak,even then, i will love you.

Labels: thank you

0 comments

hatred;angst

Tuesday, November 25, 2008 @ 11/25/2008 11:49:00 PM

currently blogging at 11:49
can't sleep,because im thinking of my life.
Why isit like this? Just to hurt me? Is that what's life for?
and im currently in no mood..
having lots of problems now. Pain here,sickness there, HEADACHE!!!!
get this fucking things out of my life please.
Well im putting everything to sleep now..
gona msg darling and off to bed..

PLEASE! MAKE MY LIFE A MEMORABLE ONE PLEASE GOD!

and btw, a friend of mine fell in love with me!!! URGH! so annoying!!

Labels: help me..

0 comments

i love your kisses

Friday, November 21, 2008 @ 11/21/2008 12:10:00 PM

I love the way you kiss me,just the way you do. You do it just so perfectly,it makes me want you more.You close your eyes and move your tounge,just the way i like.The feeling you gave me when we kiss,it makes me feel so light.You make me just so happy,you make it bright at night. You kissed me the way i want to be kissed,no one's ever gave me that kiss before,you are the only one and you will always be.I LOVE YOU! And i want you to know this;You make me feel special,you make me feel new,you make me feel loved,with everything you do.You hold me close when I am sad.You wipe the tears from my face.Every time we are together,it seemed to be the happiest moments of my life.I smile when we are together.No matter how bad things are,you always make them better.I love the way you kiss me,the way you hold me tight.I love the way you touch me,i want to be with you all night.I love the way you can make me laugh,for absolutely no reason at all.I love how no matter what I do,you will be there to catch me when i fall.I just want you to know,that even though we sometimes fight,I will always love you!No matter what, day or night.I LOVE YOU!!!!

Labels: thanks for everything

0 comments

tiredtired

Saturday, November 15, 2008 @ 11/15/2008 04:33:00 PM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

im gonna die soon..
sorry,
will update next time..

Labels: cuts and scratches everywhere, sobs

0 comments

congrats

Wednesday, November 12, 2008 @ 11/12/2008 02:37:00 PM

Dear cousin Rabiah and Abang Rafi, congratulations to your wedding!
I wish you both just the very best in your future together. May you always be happy, always be there for each other and solve all problems together!

Labels: waiting for babies

0 comments

URGGHHH!!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008 @ 11/11/2008 10:27:00 PM

I HATE LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I REALLY DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Labels: ......

0 comments

frame it

Friday, November 7, 2008 @ 11/07/2008 06:02:00 PM

Well here's a picture of us.Sorry I cant blog for now.Going out soon.Will continue blogging tmr or the next.ok? really sorry! Alright for now,gdbye

Labels: our picture, yay

0 comments

feeling so lonely

Thursday, November 6, 2008 @ 11/06/2008 08:48:00 PM

My heart aches when I talk to you.My heart aches when I dont hear from you.My heart aches when I long for you.I dont know why.You have taken over my thoughts.I cant explain.I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me.I love you because you have done more than any anybody could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy.You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself.I guarantee that we will have tough times.And I guarantee that at some point one or both of us will want to get out.But I also guarantee that if I dont ask you to be mine,i will regret it for the rest of my life.Cause I know in my heart,you are the only one for me. With these words,i want to say that you are incredibly special to me. You are so important.When you read this,I want you to think of me,smiling softly at you,and thanking you....... for all that you are.....to me.I love you.Do you really know how much you mean to me?
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night shivering from fright feeling empty, feeling nothing because I think about how it would be if you weren't here.At times,i feel so scared,so scared that i will lose you.And then I wonder if you really know how very much you mean to me, how incredible I think you are, how you are a part of all my emotions, how you are the deepest meaning in my life.Please always know that I love you more than anything else in the world, seriously,i do.Let me tell you this,before I met you, I spent a lot of time meeting all kinds of people. I had a lot of fun and learned a lot though each person I met had great characteristics, something was missing.No one person had all the qualities that I had hoped a person could have, someone whose every action and thought I could respect, someone who was very intelligent yet could also be fun-loving, someone who knew what they wanted out of life, a beautiful person inside and out.I could not find a person like this until I met you. I love you.and in you i have found friendship.I have found happiness… In you.Whether we are together or miles and miles apart. You are with me always.You are a part of me… Im yours.Beautiful memories,fun times, sad times. Whatever the mood, sharing, caring… Always,you touched my heart.You touched my soul.I will always be true.I will always be yours… Forever… I love you,

Labels: a feeling that couldnt be described

0 comments

im afraid,im alone

Monday, November 3, 2008 @ 11/03/2008 02:08:00 PM

alright,lets start blogging for after quiet some time. I have been down lately. I felt like no one was here with me to comfort me and hear me out. Im alone. Everything looks dark,im afraid. I'd just finished watching a sad movie,and it was almost the same as our situation now. I messaged you afterwards,to check on you,to feel you back again. You replied,i felt so relief. Tears just rolled down my cheeks when i messaged you just now. I felt like as if im the one facing your fears. Im scared,im really down. baby,please get well soon? im really afraid. If only i was the one,if only i was the victim. im sure everything's fine. I dont want to see you like this,I cant bear. My mind now is full of you,only you.Just to hear the word hurt,makes me wanna cry a thousand times.I really cannot stand this anymore. You are my heart,and if my heart cries for help because it is in pain,I know that's the sign of you.Thats the sign of you in pain. I love you baby. Please dont hurt my heart anymore? I dont want my heart to break and shatter. When I look at your eyes, I see your true self.I see you're sweet, and caring.I see you're giving and forgiving.I see your love for me.When I look at your eyes I stop myself from crying.When I'm alone and think about your eyes I cry.I can't stop thinking that one day I'll never see those eyes again.That I'll never see the love or the sweetness.Or the love that makes you who you are.One day you'll be gone - gone from me.Gone from this world.No matter what happens, those eyes will one day close.And forever rest in peace.But you'll never be completely gone,because every time I close my eyes,there you will be. This stone in my heart.This confusion in my mind.The words left unspoken.Haunts me all the time.Everyday I watch pass by,with an emptiness in my life.And a hole in my heart.Where only you belong.There are nights I wake up crying.And wishing you were here to hold me in your arms and kiss away my tears.There is something that keeps me holding on -What I'll never know.But one day things will go my way.And I'll have you in my arms.My love for you just won't die down -it just grows with each new day. And i've been struggling for the past few days when the incident happen. Pain... Tension... Depression...Anger, Aggression, Frustration.All these unwanted sensations -Burning, hurting, tearing my heart alone, cold and fearing.Ah, to close my eyes and let time fly by,because there's so much to gain. By forgetting these dreams driving me insane.Unfocused, unclear, out of control,my world spinning, spinning, spinning.My reason, my logic, oh, it's tragic.Like fine sand running through my hands,I'm losing my mind. That was how i felt,soso terrible. But now,im fine..Just to let you know that i'll sacrifice everything for you,just you. I'll do anything for you. Dont worry,i'll be fine. Till here, gdbye.

Labels: I love you baby

0 comments

pain

Wednesday, October 29, 2008 @ 10/29/2008 01:42:00 PM

Pain over here pain over there.Pain in my heart pain in my soul.Pain in my mind.Pain caused my heart bleed red.Pain at school.Pain at home.Pain in my head, pain in my heart.Pain in my mind, pain in my soul.Pain happening in my sleep.Pain happening in my thoughts.Pain happening when I’m alone.Pain happening in the shower, in my room, in my bed, in my house where, I’m all alone.Pain happening every hour, every minute, every second of my life.Pain caused by anger and hate. Pain caused by hurt. Pain caused by greed. Pain caused by sorrow and depression. Pain caused by grief and confusion.Im so worried!I wish the pain wasn't in my life.But it is and its killing me,it is killing me to see you're in pain too.This pain in me,causing me to have a miserable life.Only if i were there by you, im sure everything would be fine.Lonliness is tearing me apart.How can i find a way to your heart?I want your body close to mine.Now tomorrow and till the end of time.Let me surround you with all my love.Its all i have been thinking of.I want you in my life,But if i lose you,it will cut me like a knife.I want to protect you in everything you do.I dont want you to get hurt again.Think of me when you are so blue.Becoz i will run to you,wanting to hug you and give you all of me.I hope everything's alright.you're gonna get through this bad time.In the end, everything's gonna jus be fine because you wont have to do this on your own.Im here for you,you'll never be alone.Every minute of the day and night,I want to be your guiding light.rmb that i'll love you with all my heart.Soulmate,I never want us to part.I big hug from me to you.This will cheer you up in everything you do, right? So dont be scared.Put a smile on your face.We'll go throgh together, together as one.alright? BE SRTONG!I love you no matter wat ok?wen i looked back on our days, i looked and see your face,your tender touch i wont forget.I cant leave it all behind.I wish i was strong.Before hurt and pain weakened me.Tears again,tears full of pain.i have lost my way.Thoughts running through my head.My head keeps on spinning.My body walks but im not there.And at night, i lay in my warm bed,with my hands behind my head.I have a wish and i hope it comes true.To have you beside me in my bed at night.So that i can sleep soundly, knowing that you are ther,by me..to fight all my nightmares away.I love you,darling..
dont cry already ok? be strong, lets face everything together as one..dont hide in your bedroom forever.Come out and face the world.Tell everyone that you are brave.ok? I'll protect you, i promise..I wont let you fall again.I wont let you in pain again.rmb, if you are in pain, i am too.. so please,be by my side always.Dont wonder around and make yourself in trouble or pain.I'll kiss your pain away.I never want to see you like this again.Dont regret what you had done because its over.You cannot turn back time.You have to face it,not alone but with me.Face it together alright? Relax, dont worry,i'll be here for you.

Labels: lets face everything together

0 comments

i had to cry

Friday, October 24, 2008 @ 10/24/2008 01:23:00 PM

You’re the reason why I cried.The way im feeling,it's quite hard to describe.I feel so alone and lost,in this unbearable life.Too many twisted emotions.My stomach all tied in knots.Wish there was something I could do.To completely erase all these thoughts.How long must I feel this pain.I've cried so many tears.I can't stand looking in your eyes.Only to see all of my fears.How can you believe the smile on my face,when you can clearly see the pain in my eyes.Take a step back and look deeper.You're the reason why I cry.I LOVE YOU! do you feel me now?Loneliness and sorrows,pulling me down?Now if you could only read my mind love,then you'll surely know what I'm thinking of-Im alone.In a world far from perfect.I seem to fit right in.Pain, love, hurt, and sadness.When does the joy and happiness begin again? Im sorry I lied to you.It was just for your own good,I thought.And I realised that it was'nt.Im sorry.I didnt knew you knew that I cried so I took the risk and lied to you.I didnt want you to worry about me,Im scared it will affect you the next day.I'll promise I wont lie again.I wont break it.Its not easy for me to tell you what happened on that day,and I dont know why.I dont know what to do anymore.I am so lost without you.My love was real.After you left, I cried til I couldn't shed another tear. The way your arms felt around me, so tight. The way you made my darkness turn to light.
How you used to make me laugh when I was sad. How you helped me get through the good and bad. How you said our love was true. Is probably what I miss most about you.Missing you is killing me.I dont want to miss you even awhile because it hurts me deep down.Everytime, im down,im thinking of you,i cant stop thinking of you.Everytime,I send you a message,I think of you.Everything I do, I think of you so its impossible for me not to think of you.I'll cry whenever I need to,whenever I think of you.Its getting hard for me.I said im going to bed, but I lied.I said I'll laugh, but I cried.I tried not to miss you, but how can I forget you when you are always there in my mind and I kept my promise not to forget you.I pretended that I'm strong, but deep down, I was soo wrong.I held back all my tears to show you that I wasnt crying,to show you that I was strong,that I can do it.But in the end,I have to break down and showed you that I was weak. And true enough, I was weak,everybody knew it too.I would never ever say good bye to your memories, from heart & mind.I'll keep you there, hidden inside.Deep down away.Days will pass & also years, but your memories will never leave.Till the day that I will be gone forever.

I WANT TO CRY,CRY ON YOUR SHOULDER,

I NEED SOMEONE WHO CARES FOR ME,

MY HEART GETS COLDER WHEN IM SAD.

you showed me what real love can do.

Labels: i cannot take this anymore

0 comments

missing you!

Thursday, October 23, 2008 @ 10/23/2008 07:03:00 PM

The lonely days and lonely nights,just seem to linger on,one day turns in to the next.Now that you are gone.You were such a part of me and I failed to realize,just how empty one could feel,when part of one dies.So many dreams we shared together,that couldnt come true,but memories of the good and bad,some how has brought peace to me.The more I think, the more i'll get hurt,at least I have memories to keep,I know we’ll meet again soon enough,but I can’t wait because this is tough.And every time I see a pretty flower,I think of you then my eyes shower,i miss you like crazy.There's still a longlong way to go,and now im weeping away.Imagine when days goes by.What will I do? Stare into space? Like what you did? I wonder. This year has come to an end and im begining to miss all those memorable days I had with you. Those, I treasure deepdeep down inside me,where nobody knows.I can't wait for the beautiful days next year but im not ready to know what will be going on next year too.haiz, life is tough,too tough for me. Im sorry I broke down just now. Memories of us just kept going in and out of my mind.And those memories were too beatiful that made me weep.Everything you did to me was extremely great and really appreciate what you did.I can never have anybody else when im happy with you.I must take this chance and oppotunity to let me know and have true love in life. And take this in mind,no matter where we will be going next year,remember me like you used to,don't break all your promises,stay close to me and don't get far from me.Keep all our memories in you because you'll need it when im gone.Don't fade away from me,you'd made your promise. We had gone through everything together,through thicks and thins,through good,bad,ugly and beatiful days.We had gone through all these together,remember. I'll always be by you even when we will be going to our own different ways next year.REMEMBER THIS TOO; I love you.

Labels: how i wish time could stop

0 comments

goodbye evrybody!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008 @ 10/22/2008 06:17:00 PM

It's time to say goodbye.Our year has come to an end.I've made more cherished memories,and found my love.We have learned and grow,and change from day to day,I hope that all the things we had done,have helped us in future.So with happy memories, I send myself out of the school gate and telling myself, this year is over.And i will have great hope and expectations for what next year holds in me.We will say goodbye to our fellow classmates,holidays are here,it's time for us to part.But i will remember you guys and keep you all in my heart, especially my love one.

GDBYE classroom,
GDBYE teachers,
GDBYE friends,
GDBYE enemies,
GDBYE zoelyn.

we'll meet again nxt year,with different classes, with different environment.Looking at your results and mine,we'll sure to be apart next year.Im sorry,I had not done my best for you.I know I played a fool this year and I regret it.
I want to cry every night,because I miss the way we fight,the way we were together, and whatever we did in the past.I pray for you every night,because I miss you not being at my side.I miss the way you smell,I miss the look upon your face,that made me smile.I love you so much I can’t deny,for when I see you, I will break down and cry.I miss you,I miss the way you hold me tight,the way you were with me,your sense,your present.I miss how you can always tell from my eyes,but I hated that I couldn’t tell any lies.I miss the goose bumps on my arms.I miss the sound of your heartbeat,that makes me feel so complete.I miss those 3 words you say,and I long to hear them everyday.I miss your arms wrapped around me,I hope you can see, we’re meant to be.And I will be there next year,till then, I promise I’ll hold back the tears.Unless i had to.When I’m with you my heart pounds fast,when we’re apart my heart rips in two.All my life I never thought I’d feel this way,laying on my bed, all alone in the dark,sobbing,missing you.I hug my pillow believing that its you,I know there is other people in the world,but i don’t want them, i want you and only you.One tear strolls down my cheek then another then another,I won’t stop this till you’re right here by my side,missing your smile, missing the things you do,I sit on my bed,missing you…I need you! I want you! and I’ll feel this way until I have you!You wipe away my tears,you frighten away my fears.My life is incomplete without you,my heart is apart till I have you,I pray, I wish, and dream till the day I’ll be with you until then I’ll be here,missing you…I just want to say straight from my heart,I miss you.You brought me hope, when I had none,you gave me love, when I had little and opened my heart to you, each day that passed, I’ve shed a tear,I’m lost in love, without you here,you are my heart, you will forever be,beautiful memories that will stay forever with me,tomorrow is coming, and I’m scared to cry,I know I’ll be thinking of you, and once again I ask why? Why must it end?
gdbye,darling. sigh.

Labels: will remember you guys till the ned

0 comments

miss you

Saturday, October 11, 2008 @ 10/11/2008 08:39:00 PM

life here without u is difficult almost impossible.day and night sleep or awake i cant get u out of my head. this so called life doesnt fell right if ur not by my side.i never ever thought time can go by so slow.a second seems like a minute a minute seems like an hour an hour seems like a day.It's just not the same without you.You're always there for me through both the good times and the bad.You're always there to laugh with, or to help me when I'm sad.Walking around the block,We never really ran out of things to say.we are one of a kind.My heart aches, I don't know what to do without you.Living without you...its the hardest thing I've ever had to do.I can't stop living, but I can't keep pretending.The best that I can do...Is get up each morning and smile-fake smiles. while im sleeping tonight,you can bet that i'll be dreaming about you. i miss you badly! i spend my days thinking about you. I spend my nights wishing you were here.hmm,everyday that passes,my feelings begin to grow,wanting you so badly and never wanting to let go.i grow more restless everytime i sleep cuz everytime i close my eyes,i picture you next to me and when i open my eyes i'm filled with a lonely sadness to see that your not there.everyday i start with you not there only leaves my heart with more pain to bare because you're my other half that keeps me whole and without you there, makes me like a handicap.i miss you.My soul knows no rest even when I sleep,because I dream about you and imagine how great it would be if you were here with me.Without you,I feel like a part of my heart is missing,and a apart of me is gone. i'll never stop wishing you'll be here because I love you,and I want you here with me.but relax, i can overcome this.no matter how far you'll be, i'll still be here waiting for you and for your return.my life is so beautiful because DEAR, its you.MY LIFE. it hurts me to know how i sometimes can be little selfish when it comes to you. i am getting too sensitive over small things.how shameful.im sorry.

fear of future is worse than pain of the past,
still i bother the least, because you are there,
even seconds are too long to miss you,
i want to hold your hands & walk a mile,
dont want to miss you,even a while.

I MISS YOU!!!

Labels: miss you badly:(

0 comments

im sorry

Thursday, October 9, 2008 @ 10/09/2008 05:19:00 PM

My darling, with this simple question, I hope to obtain a meaningful answer, well thought, no refrain.Can you forgive my foolish thoughts, my selfish pride?Can I take back the harsh words, doubtful moments and all your tears?I know its not possible, but can you give me a chance to show you every day how much I care, how much I am in love with you?Don't answer too quickly, think about what I've said.For only with your forgiveness, can I truly rest my head.I love you dearly..
A thousand times I can ask for forgiveness.A thousand times you will say no n say that you dont need an apology.A thousand times will I think about you in an hour.A thousand times in a hour will you think about how I hurt you.A thousand times will I remember how great you were to me.A thousand times will you remember how awful I was to you.A thousand times did I have the chance to make things right.A thousand times the opportunity was missed.
please forgive me for the painful and heartache experience you had? I dont wish this thing to happen again and im telling you right now that I truly regret what had I done in the past that breaked your heart.I'm sorry sorry for my carelessness, your feelings I've neglected, your heart I broke so forgive me will you?

Labels: i love you my darling

0 comments

stress!

Saturday, September 27, 2008 @ 9/27/2008 12:49:00 PM

My lives are so filled, with tension and stress. I work hard all week. I studied and go to remedials/tuitions. I did the best, the very best I can. Im very proud of myself, not only me, my friends, parents ans everyone. But I found out that somehow, this may affect me before the exams. Im too STRESSED, TOO PRESSURIZED! but, I must though, always remember to be true to myself and others. I must never let the pressure of being number one run my live. I will only be here, for a very short time. So I can't get so caught up, in this competition. when days grew nearer, I felt a little nervous to take the exams. It felt as though im facing the toughest challenge of my live. God, help me. Not forgetting Zoelyn, my companion for life. Thanks for the support you gave me all these while. You are the one who awakes me from this dreamland, you are the one who made me realised about the consequences of me not studying. Now, that I took her advice, it seemed so easy for me to cope with things in the class, for example science. It has neen so easy for me to do the things that Mdm Suriati gave us, ALL BECOZ OF YOU! thanks, tii here ok?

Labels: hmm, thanks

0 comments

Thanks for everything

Monday, September 15, 2008 @ 9/15/2008 06:04:00 PM

There's something in a simple hug. That always warms my heart; It makes my day and CHEERs ME UP. I miss the way you hold me tight in your arms. I'd always wished to have your hands around me forever but i cant, haiz. Thanks for the support, encouragement and comfort you gave me these few days. I'd rather been very down. I've been pushed down so many times, i've gone through all the painful and hurtful experiences. I have no strength to get up. I'm not worth it any more. I'm just a useless, ordinary child who is being abused by them. I'm hurt, VERY HURT. I sometimes find I'm drifting. Through this life without effect; I often wonder if I'm truly worth what I've been blessed. It seems like the harder that I try, the more i fail. It just serves to add more questions to my problems. Perhaps I'm trying just too hard? To make them understand me? Idk.. Each incident, each moment passed makes me think who am I? Who am I to deserve this kind of treatment. Who? Idk.. Or will it leave me broken, and confused like I feel now,while questions bring no answers,to this painful world of mine. For somewhere deeper, there must be some meaning to this life,some way to make a difference,give me a reason for this rubbish! but somehow, somewhere a bestfriend of mine came in and changed everything, changed everything for the better. She brings a smile to my face, inspire me, and make me see that I will be okay. Your ability to cheer me up when you see that I am down makes me a better person. You're so very special in every single way. And thoughts of you run through my head. Every hour of the day, I hope that you will understand, just how I feel about you. I want to be your guiding hand. For all that you go through. You calm me down when Im angry, you cheer me up when im down, you gave me solutions to my problems and you showed everything that I wanted. I guess who would be there doing all this things to me when you're gone.Thanks, I love you.

Labels: abused

0 comments

I love the way you hug me

Saturday, September 13, 2008 @ 9/13/2008 02:08:00 PM

Another day with zoelyn. How I wish today won't end. How I wish there's no tomorrow. How I wish...haiz. Right now I'm gonna take you in my arms. Hold you closer and tighter then I ever before. I won't let go off you. I want to be by your side forever. Let's love like there's no tomorrow, I bet everything will be fine. I wanted to go home or rather I went home is because of my parents, if not I won't. But the moment I found out that they're not home, I just felt so regrettful. I called you. That's the reason. I love you. The distance between you and me is only a heartbeat away,you know all my emotions, you know me. You've been a true friend. I hope you'll stay. I would be so very empty, if you ever went away, i'm serious. I’ll be loving you forever. Deep inside my heart. Even if you took my heart. And tore it apart, I would love you. You’re the last thing in my mind. Before I go to sleep at nite, i'll always think of you. When trouble’s in my mind,you put my soul at ease. There is no one in this world who can love me like you do. So many reasons that i want to spend forever with you. Just remember this, when you feel all alone, and that no one seems to care. Think again, and you'll find, I'm always going to be there.When you find yourself in a problem,and you feel there is no way out.I'm always going to be there,just tell me.When you're having a bad day,and just want to have a good time.I'm always going to be there,I'll be your companion.When you don't feel loved,and think your world has come to an end.Think again,i'm always going to be there,I promise to always be your true bestfriend, I promise.

Labels: i love you

0 comments

the unbreakable bond

Thursday, September 11, 2008 @ 9/11/2008 08:28:00 PM

When I cry you help me out.When I'm happy you hear me shout.When I grin you know I'm really mad because you are my best friend.You can tell when I'm sad.
You're there in thick and thin.You're my best friend.You hear me out when I want to talk.You help me out when I get mad.You are the bestest friend I've ever had.
So hear me out when I say.You're the light in my day.You are the moon in my night.You shine very bright.You are the bestest friend I have and I miss you.
hey, I just want to tell you that i'll always be by your side when in times you are happy or sad. I'll try my very best to make you feel better. I'll try my best to entertain you. I'l try my best to do whatever that is instructed by you, simply because I love you. You'l' be loved by me, don't worry. I'll takecare of you. I'll make sure you're always in good conditions. I won't allow you to be mad, sad, angry, frusterated, stress, etc etc. I'll make you calm when you are mad,when you cry I'll wipe away all of your tears. I'll make sure no tears is left on your cheeks. When you're scared I'll fight away all your fears and make sure you're alright.You'll know ill always be there when things get tough,I'll help you when It's hard& painful. Try and make you laugh and always be nice,I'll never let you down, ill always be here,because I live for you, just for you. I want you to know how much you mean to me,I'll guide you through the darkness if you can't see,happiness is what I want for you because I want you to be smiling always.I hope that all your dreams come true,no matter what I'll be here to the end.I want you to know, I love you my friend.You’re the one I will never forget.If I die before you do, Ill go to heaven and wait for you.

Once again i'm reminding you this, IT'S OVER! you can't rewind back time, you can't because all you have now is your future, not the past. So please, my dear friend, I don't want to hear about him again. I know it's hard for you to let him go, but face it. If I can, why not you? Right? Syahirah helped me forget him, now it's my turn to help you. He's life seems okay, in a sense. He's feeling find then why not you? Please? For the sake of me? I'm telling you this is for your own sake and it's for your better. Who else will remind you this? Tell me? no one.. Only me, right? you don't want me to be emo right? then try your best okay. I'm not totaly blaming you, i'm not totally forcing you. I'm just telling you what is right for yourself. Alright? Face it..

Last but not least, I want to apologise to people outside there if i'd change evrything, if i'd change everything for the worse, i'm sorry. But life goes on. okay?

Labels: haiz..

0 comments

being apart hurts ):

Wednesday, September 10, 2008 @ 9/10/2008 06:02:00 PM

BEING APART WITH YOU HURTS!

It really does hurt. Everytime when we had to go on our separate ways, I think and look back if I can chase you and hug you at that moment,if I can be with you forever. If I can, how would life be? I wonder... I really had this strong feeling of not letting you go whenever we meet. I just kept quiet and put a false smile on my face just to make you feel secured. And it's true. Whenever I was emo out of a sudden, I always think how strong this friendship is. I'm truly sorry if I said i'm not. I'm never letting go, and i know this is true.The smallest things you do,just makes me really love and adore you. And its the small details I'll carry for the rest of my days. I love you so much, I don't think i can tell you enough. Expressing my feelings is so much easier, its not as hard. I'm so happy that one day I'll be by your side. Building our lives together, being happy, living our lives. With no more hurt, no more pain, no more negative feelings, i'll wait for the day. But I'm going to do my best, to make you see what i see and be me. I want you to to see how much i love you, that life is nothing without you. That you are my heart, my world, my everything. The greatest gift that life could bring. I love you so much and i will never hurt you again. I love you, will all my heart, I know never in my life, will we ever be apart.

Labels: gdbye

0 comments

I love you

Tuesday, September 9, 2008 @ 9/09/2008 08:01:00 PM

I feel your warm gentle touch,you help me feel protected,as long as you love me,I'll stay by your side,I'll be your companion,your friend and your guide.As long as you love me,as long as you care,I'll do anything for you,I'll go anywhere.As long as forever,my love will be true,for as long as you love me,I'll only love you!I love the way you make me laugh,and the ways you show me you care,I love the way you say, "I Love You"
And the way you're always there.I love the way you touch me,always sending chills down my spine,I love that you are with me,and glad forever you are mine.You are always there for me,even when times get tough.
You are the love of my life,my heart and my soul.My beloved girl,
As I awaken, each and every day,thoughts of love turn to you.An unbreakable bond between us two,a special love ever so true.We've shared many joys,and also felt some sorrows,yet our future is filled,Of wonderful tomorrows.
So, until that bright day,far away such as it seems,you shall always be my one true love...
The woman of my dreams.This feeling of love that I have for you,a feeling so strong, so special, so new.You give me the gift of happiness each day,never have I known it could be this way.You have given your love regardless of cost,with my heart in your care, I will never be lost.
I will nvr ignore you again.I promise.
For each day I pray to the heavens above.
That you always remember my feelings for you.
A feeling so strong, so special, so new
Thanks, my love..

For those outside there, if you think i'm a fcuking bitch, if you think that i'm not perfect, if you think i'm like this-GUESS WHAT?
I dont give a damn on it!
You guys are just so fcuking irritating. Go and mine your own bussiness,for my life I do not share

Labels: I dont give a damn

0 comments

Friday, September 5, 2008 @ 9/05/2008 08:43:00 PM

You have come back,
And with you,
You brought love.
You have brought back,
Those loving arms,
That holds me tight.
You have brought back,
That loving smile,
That never left me.
You have brought back,
A new start,
To another love.
You have come back
And with you,
You brought love.
I miss you!
pls, don't leave me again, in
this cold world..
I need your arms,
I need your warmth..
pls..
im truely sorry if i betrayed you
last time, im seriously sorry.
I didnt know it was my fault and
I didnt know what did I do.
im confused.
I didnt make it a fact because I
know you still have a heart for him.
and seriously that wasnt true at all.
it was only seconds..
understand?
i dont want to betray you, I seriously dont.
haiz.
if only you could understand my feelings
at that point of time.
at least you wont keep this in mind till today.
im sorry.
Till here for today..

0 comments

this is how i miss you

Tuesday, September 2, 2008 @ 9/02/2008 05:45:00 PM

Labels: miss you badly

0 comments

1 more day

Monday, September 1, 2008 @ 9/01/2008 02:13:00 PM

Im missing you, the way you sound,the way you make me smile.I miss the times we had together,I miss the way you would laugh with me,I miss the thoughts that put me to sleep, the thoughts of knowing,that you loved me.Look at me and let me see,see it in your eyes.You miss it too,I know you do,but your words leave me alone in the night.Im missing you and those little thing you do,the simplest little things.I miss the way you'd look at me,you would always lean to me.Trying to forget is not what I want,I want to hold on and not let it be lost.The way you make me laugh,I miss all of this and so much more, i love you.I feel like Im very empty, like nothing makes sense inside me, im down.I am lost without you and all I do is cry in my room and think about someone special that I love. I cant live without you, I miss you so much. Life here without you is dificult, almost impossible. Day and night, sleep or awake, I cant get you out of my head. Life doesnt feel right if youre not by my side. I never ever thought time can go by so slow. A second seems like a minute, a minute seems like an hour and hour seems like a day. And here I am waiting for that day.All I can say is I miss you so much,and just cant wait again to feel your touch.You are my heart and soul too,I just feel so lost without you.Every since the day you left,my eyes cannot stop crying.And this broken heart of mine,each day is slowly dying.I just cant help but miss you.Since you went away,I may act like I'm okay,but im not.im sorry. When you are gone and not near by,I feel so alone.I dont know why.Well, maybe it's because I miss you so much. You always seem to understand,and without any doubt you lend a helping hand,and always help me out.i miss you

Labels: i miss you

0 comments

I miss you

Friday, August 29, 2008 @ 8/29/2008 12:20:00 PM

Still sobbing throughout the day, I want to be with you,but your millions of miles away.i wish you would call just to ask about me.it would make things so much better if i could hear your voice,I guess i can't complain too much, because afterall, i'm making you feel guilty.i wish i could hold you in my arms and look into your eyes.i promise i will always be true to you and never tell you lies.its so hard to go to sleep without you by my side.my tears are the only thing flowing by.i lie awake in bed as the tears stream down my face, they keep going until they hit my pillow case.That's how i miss you.I miss you,it hurts to think of everything we went through.I wish you could see my heart. I hate that we're apart but still i could wait.Baby i miss you so much.you've changed me into someone i dont know, someone who is really in love with you.I'm staring at my computer screen and it remains the same. I thought i would see you online but thinking back, it's impossible. I'm so crazy without you. haiz. In the morning just now, when i woke up, and i open my eyes, i feel an aching in my heart. That's when i realize, how much i really miss you.

Labels: Haizzzzzzzz

0 comments

I'M CRYING

Thursday, August 28, 2008 @ 8/28/2008 05:59:00 PM

I'M MISSING YOU RIGHT NOW.

Whenever I needed someone to talk to,you were always there.My eyes filled with tears, my heart filled with pain, and you were always there.There was no time when I had doubt to come to you because you were always there.I could see in your eyes you wanted to help, and that you really cared.Whenever I was down,you were always there.No matter what,you were always there.Whenever I felt like nothing matter,you were always there.Now youre gone, and I don't know what to do.I close my eyes and think of you, and how you were always there.It's hard to look at the pictures, and get memories of you. At night I pray, and I speak to you.I guess you were right when you told me no matter how far you were,you would always be there.I know that you're be seeing me later, but till then I have to say goodbye.Even though it hurts to hear your name, and speak of you,one thing I will always say is,you were always there in my heart. Once again, im sorry that i hurt you just now.when the unknown person came knocking on the door just now, i can sense that somethings wrong, i can feel it. And once she asked for zoelyn, my heart broke and shatter into millions of pieces like the glass from a broken window. Every time my heart shatters,I kneel down and start to pick the pieces, every pieces of my heart that consist you. I'm sorry that i broke my heart/you. With a swollen heart and tears in my eyes, i could'nt believe you had to say goodbye. I looked into my heart with blood overflowing and tears in my eyes, I felt my heart is exploding, I felt myself dying. How can I go on with my heart so still? so painfull? But then I realised that i'd no more tears to cry on, no more shoulder to cry on and no more support to bring me to life back.I never thought I'd see this day,I never thought I'd feel this way, i'm sad. If only you were here to know what's happening, i bet you'll cry along with me. seriously, my face is full and covered with tears right now.I'd to blog this right now eventhough my conditions are bad because i'll be leaving tmr. for camp. But i bet it won't be fun without you. I really need you right now. Today, after you left me alone, i cried. and guess what? I didnt have a shoulder to cry on and things get worsen when miss ng scolded me. What can I do? i was in a bad situation and she expected me to pay attention. But still i didnt blame you for all this, maybe you're right-you need a break from me. But let me tell you this,I'm left with emptiness in me. I want to send my love to you there, and remind you of all this things. Just so you'll know, you mean so much to me, I love you. you walked away just now, but i chase you because I did'nt want you to leave me. I wanted you to be by my side and hug you one last time. I really need you right now. I need your shoulders right now, I need your comfort right now, I need your warmth right now, I need your support right now, I need you right now.
I LOVE YOU!

Labels: I simply can't leave you

0 comments

I'll cry when you're gone

Wednesday, August 27, 2008 @ 8/27/2008 05:42:00 PM

When You're Gone I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and
make it ok I miss you
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
[Chorus]

We were made for each other
Out here foreverI know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do,
I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah
[Chorus]

Zoelyn, i'm too afraid of letting you go.I'll be missing you badly.I can't go on without you.My life is your life, your life is my life.So whnever you're not around,I can feel it strong in my heart.you're my friend,we went thru moments that were good and bad,even moments that were happy and sad.you suported me when i was in tears,we stuck together when we were in fear,its really sad that it had to be this way,but it has reached its very last day.miles away cant keep us apart,'cause you'll always be in my heart.I love you my dear.when I think of you.I think of all that we've been through.All the times we argue and fight,I know deep inside that it isn't right.I, then feel bad and alot of pain.It feels like I've fallen from the sky.I love you dear friend with all of my heart.But now that you're gone I've fallen apart.I wish sometimes this was all a big lie.I pray to you every night.I can't change your past with all it's heartache and pain,nor the future with its untold stories.But I can be there now when you need me to care.Same goes to you, thnx.GOD knew that everyone needs.Companionship and cheer,He knew that people need someone whose thoughts are always near.He knew they need someone kind.To lend a helping hand.Someone to gladly take the time.To care and understand.GOD knew that we all need someone.To share each happy day,to be a source of courage when troubles come our way.Someone to be true to us,Whether near or far apart.Someone whose love we'll always hold and treasure in our hearts.That's Why GOD Gave Us Friends. thnk you GOD for your gift and thank you zoelyn for being my true friend.When i cry,she will be by,if i am away,she will msg me day by day,if i need her at all,she'll be there to stand tall!Anything i say will be heard!She will listen word by word!If I am late, she would take my books down to the quadrangle and wait for me.thnx! I will always be there for you right to the end! I PROMISE!I want to hold your hands and walk a mle.I don't want to miss you, even for ahwhile, because i don't want you t go away.Hug me from my worries, hug me when i'm down, hug me tightly when I cry.Just hug me, my friend.You would be there for me, if i had a tear in my eye,you always had jokes to make me laugh and cry. you're a serious person,and always took the lead. So, i end this, from the bottom of my heart, I LOVE YOU.
I'LL MISS YOU DEARLY.

Labels: I love you till the end

0 comments

I cant afford you to leave me

Monday, August 25, 2008 @ 8/25/2008 09:15:00 PM

Please, tell me everything you could. even if you have noyhing to say. Because I know ther's something not right whenever you start to be emo. I can see it, Zoelyn. Please don't feel guilty, please. Eventhough at times I feel as though i'm alone, without you, i know deep inside my heart that you'll come to me one day. I had to cry because my weakness brings my tears and I have no one to hold me close whenever you're not around. I'm sorry if I made you this way, i'm really sorry, zoelyn. As days grew nearer, i don't have the mood at all to go to school, seriously. Nowadays I don't really emphasais on the dates 28 & 29 because I don't want to feel sad. your wish is granted. I feel as though you're dissappering from my life forever. Don't disappear. By disappearing from me, you will disappear from yourself.For the first time I am truly afraid, too scared to see, if what is special, to me will fade away from this cold world. Zoelyn, don't dissappear, stay strong with me, I want to be beside you I wish to hold your hand now, so please don't dissappear. PLEASE? i CAN SERIOUSLY IMAGINE, THE DAY YOU'LLL BE LEAVING ME- EXACTLY AT 12 NOON. it's so scary. I can imagine when you turned and say goodbye. I can imagine that you'll walked away and turned as you walked off. I can imagine how i'll react. I can imagine that i'm gonna cry. I can imagine. I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH THAT I CAN'T LET GO OF YOU. before you leave, please let me have the time to be with you, before you'll leave me? please let me have the most wonderful time i'll have with you? please? I really can't afford you to leave.

Labels: I love you too much

0 comments

Sunday, August 24, 2008 @ 8/24/2008 12:45:00 PM

0 comments

@ 8/24/2008 12:29:00 PM

Would You Be There,If I were blue, would you be there for me,

And whisper in my ears that's ok.

Would you stand by me, let me hold you tight,

And say you love me one more time.

If I feel good, would you slow dance with me,

And touch my lips with tender loving care,

Would you die for me, would you run with me,

And never look back..

Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,to take my breath away?

Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,to take my breath away?

Would you be there..If I am away, would you still think of me,

And wished that you could hold me now.

Would you die for me, would you run with me,

All the way ...

Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight,Would you swear that your love is always true,

Would you say that you always be there,

To kiss my pain away,

Would you be there to love, to be with me?

Would you swear that your love is always true?

Would you say that you'll always be the one,to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight,

Would you swear that your love is always true,

Would you say that you always be there,

To kiss my pain away,Would you be there .....

for me ...

0 comments

I'm sorry I kept things from you

Saturday, August 23, 2008 @ 8/23/2008 09:25:00 PM

i'm sorry for the things i'd kept from you. I didn't mean to do so. it's simply because I don't want you to worry.That's all.I never told you how you made me smile,I never told you how you kept me sane for a while,I never told you how you made me laugh,I never told you how you were my other half.I never told you so much that I should have,I never told you how you were my guide, I never told you how I looked up to you, I never told you how you made me feel everytime I saw you,I never told you how I loved you,I never told you that you were like my sister,I never told you that you were more, you were my secret lover,I never told you how you helped me survive,I never told you that you were the only one who kept me alive,I never told you how I loved you, when you were beside me. What i did was to tell you by messages, i'm sorry. I can't speak and tell you my true feeling because i can't stand to see how's your reaction. that is the reason why i blogged. you told me that you cried, and that's the reason why. what if i tell you face to face? im sure you'll cry. I can't stand to see you cry, that's the reason why. even if i tell you, i can't stop smiling.I can't be serious, because i don't want you to be sad.If only you knew and could look inside my heart,see how I truely feel about you.Only then would you understand,how i do care,how i would do anything for you to take my hand and lead me there.But maybe there will be a day,where i can tell you,how special you are to me in so many ways. I'll promise, i'll face you, one day and tell you everything i feel.There's something i'm hiding but I wouldn't say,yet I keep a broken smile spread across my face,hiding the signs and forgetting the past, i'm sorry. It's not okay for me to keep the feelings from you, because you're my bestfriend. I should'nt keep anything from you, I should have told you that day.I know I can act a little stubborn sometimes,just because there's something very wrong between those emty lines, but please understand me. Sometimes i can tell you what happen when everything settle.Don't you know I'll be lost without you?I'm sorry that I told you I was happy when you know i'm not,i'm sorry i said nothing happened when there is,because you've been with me too long and you can really see who i am today. Whatever the consequences,I'll never leave your side,I can't let something so important to me just let go and die,because you see, I love you,and my feeling's on you only grew.I won't let you go down the wrong way,you're mine, no matter what crazy things you might say.Just Remember I love You.

oh ya, another thing to bring up, IT'S OVER! i know you're tired of it. I know you're sick of it, i know you had enough. You should stop loving him, PLEASE.Just give up on him, because he would'nt care.So why waste your time on him? He'd broken your heart, so why do you want to mend it? Just give up, dear. It's over, it's done. Remember, it's better to have loved and lost rather than not loved at all. Till here..

Labels: it's over la

0 comments

LONELY, I GUESS?

Thursday, August 21, 2008 @ 8/21/2008 06:12:00 PM

Well, i told you so.9 days can pass at the speed of 300'000'000'm/s. But on that particular day, I think it won't.It'll past so 'fast', I bet? hais, saying gdbye is the hardest thing to do.You always listened and knew what to say, knew when to hug me when i was having a bad day.No one will ever take your place, i can always promise you this.It's hard to find a friend like you, so know you'll always be missed by IZYAN! This is seriously a fact, why does it take a minute to to say hello and forever to say gdbye? why? this world is so cold man! hais, you had to leave one day, on the day we spent most of our time together.We had lots of memories and lots of fun.Now i don't know what to do when your gone.We hung out almost everyday.AT school you gave me encouragement, you showed me love and warmth.You'll always be my best friend.Whether we're here or there.I'll always be your friend.No matter what.I'll miss you so much when you leave.You'll miss me so much too.You've known me more than i've known you. Then the time when you said,"I'm going", I had mixed emotions when you told me.I wasn't sure wheather I should be sad or happy.It's just so sudden.Well not only that particular day, but I think this post is for the whole of September holidays.
TELL ME?! tell me, zoelyn!tell me, you can read mt thoughts when you are far far far away from me,tell me that you loved me just one more time, my friend.Tell me you'll come join me to laugh within my dreams. Tell me!
hais, zoelyn, sleep well ok, when i'm not there, accompanying you. you must have enough sweetdreams to continue on with your vacation ok? here's a gdnight wish for you when you are there, gdnight, my dear! Across the dark, I send my love to you, and may your sleep be sweet and deep and all your dreams come true.And so, my dear, good-night!
LONELY, this is what i could think of now.Shall i create an imaginary friend and spend time with 'it' during my wonderfull September holidays? or shall i just imagine zoelyn is there by my side and I could talk to 'her' like how i talked to her in school?! NO MAN! The situation will be damn different and odd.People will think that i'm crazy, talking alone by myself. I hate to say good-bye, yet we have to say farewell, for we shall meet again, but its too far ahead. imagine, 1 day without you is a suffering day,then what about 10 days?!
A tear comes to mind, when I think of you. every hour, every minute, every second. so till here my dear, gdnight!

Labels: I'LL MISS YOU

0 comments

There is no need for an apology

Wednesday, August 20, 2008 @ 8/20/2008 05:37:00 PM

REMEMBER ME LIKE HOW I REMEMBER YOU

As days grew nearer,the emptiness falls down on me.I simply can't imagine what it would be like on that particular day,I just can't.It's far too hard for me to accept this reality but I've to face it.Live goes on.I just can feel the loneliness in me, it's so scary.The day I won't be with you is just so undescrible.I could'nt imagine how i'm gonna behave in class.All these days, I behaved wildly in class is because of you.You are the one who gave me courage and strength in me.imagine.Will I be emo? or would I just stay quiet? Is'nt that the same?hmm, lets not think far, but it's not. 9 more days-and that's extremely NEAR! But no worries my friend, i'll still be the Izyan you wanted.There's nothing you can repay me.Like what you said, i just needed your company,that's all my dear.To watch you leaving is so sad.I can't take this.I'll defenitely cry for you.Will this be the last? Because I cannot take it anymore.Just to hear the word 'goodbye' makes me wanna cry a thousand times.You'll go the distance,you'll travel distant lands,you'e far from me.But don't worry my tears will soon dissapear,you'll kill all the pain in me soon after the holidays are over n I get to see you again.No need for an apology, like what you said.It's not your fault, I know. Put this in heart, no matter how far apart we'll be, i'll never ever forget you.Even when you're not there beside me, I can always imagine you were there-by my side.Remember this.I know you'll be enjoying yourself there but pls,make a gap for me, to fit me into your enjoyments, PLEASE! Even during those emo days i'll be having later, I know and you know it's because i'm thinking of you.I'll still remember you, always and forever, in my heart and mind.I can't imagine this, who will wish you gdnight when you're there?Who will accompany you till you fall asleep?Who will make crappy jokes?Who will make you laugh and smile?Who will entertain you? WHO?? and same goes here.Who will be there when I need a helping hand? encouragement? support? love? warmth? company? care? WHO?! There's no one who can replace a friend like you.

Labels: Don't feel guilty, it's not your fault

0 comments

SUSU? MILK?

Tuesday, August 19, 2008 @ 8/19/2008 09:54:00 PM

I HATE SUSU!

she's such a pain in my ass! arrrgghh.Today you’re alive and living while someone, innocent jus lost her interest in you.People who are dying right now aren’t as lucky as you to be living a healthy life. SCOLD! SCOLD SCOLD! what other things you can do besides scolding? Today she hurts me or rather abuse me like she abused a little kid.Can't she grow up? c'mon lah, she has 3 children at home. can't she even understands me?! You'll never see the bright side of me if you're always judging me by my dark side.i'm a good girl la! SEE THE BRIGHT SIDE OF IZYAN, PLS! Can I kill you? If can, let me know ok? or can i just kill myself and end my life here just like that and enjoy myself in heaven? hmm. But thinking twice, i'm just a coward who does'nt wanna face it.Killing myself is saying “I give up and I’m a wimp!” but Izyan don't give up,for she know she have strength within,for she know she can persevere,for she know that she can win, she will never give up.Because it's someone else's fault,because I am settling for good enough and i'm happy. There is so much I can still do,there is too much talent to waste,there is so much in me that I want you to see. not forgetting, I STILL HAVE ZOELYN!She entered, bringing light and life to me,with tender care,added comfort and warmth.I have to thank you for the light, my friend. I love you..Well, this is life; what can I do?

Labels: fcuk off

0 comments

The reason why I did this

Monday, August 18, 2008 @ 8/18/2008 04:30:00 PM

Seriously,I did'nt mean to make you feel guilty but I cannot take this anymore.In order to make me feel secured,I'd to shout out my feelings.I'd to tell you how I feel,ryte? I cannot keep anything inside me,like you said.I just feel as though you're leaving me forever.You are my friend of friends,my closest companion.You are the one I turn to for comfort when my heart is heavy and the first one I run to when I have good news to share.Through seasons and years,you've grown nearer to my heart and I want you always to know my friend, how much I love you.Some of the happiest times of my life are times you and I spend together.For deep in my heart I've considered you special- One of my dearest friends ever.Time after time I've enjoyed your nice company,warmed by your closeness we share and when there were days that I needed encouragement,I knew you'd always be there.That is the reason why I'm doing this. I just don't feel good to have a friend, leaving me just like that.Eventhough it's only 2 days,but I still can feel the lonelines in me.I'm not stopping you from leaving me here,but I just want you to know that I'll be damn lonely and empty without you! Take that in mind.I'll not forget you,of course.Just one simple request,don't forget me!

Labels: It's 2 days

0 comments

AAAARRRRGGGHHHH

Saturday, August 16, 2008 @ 8/16/2008 07:34:00 PM

HER NAME IS IZYAN:)

My throat has been at its worst condition ever since YESTERDAY. The pain is unbearable and i could cough louder than a german shepherd. Ooh yeah. Its really frustrating and i've done so many different things to try curing it. Been relyin mostly on plain water, but it just made me frequent the restroom. It's really painful - imagine someone strangling you and tickling ur throat. heh.My nose is cold, my toes are NUMB. My neck is stiff, my spine is weak. I hardly whisper when I speak. My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear, There is a hole inside my ear. and my heart is-
...WHAT?

Being sick is no fun.
When you get a cold,
It makes your nose run.
It makes you sneeze.
It makes you cough.
It makes your whole body
come to a halt.

Labels: SICK, SICKK, SICKKK

0 comments

MJ Clone!

Seminars!

Shooooo!

Recaps!

Archives!

Thanks to!